What is unrealistic?

“Unrealistic expectation leads to discontent.
The acceptance of all – dark and light, smooth and rough alike with an open heart and pure intention leads to genuine transformation.
Inspiration can be found in nature’s organic irregularity.
Inspiration and beauty can be found within the unique irregularity of you.
We practice, not for the sake of a perfect pose, but for the prana that stirs the blood and inspires change.”
Dena Kingsberg

I read Dena’s words last night and it got me thinking about what is unrealistic , what constitutes something completely beyond expectation? Maybe I should ask her when I see her later this month.

Some expectations may be unrealistic now, but if we work at them every day perhaps they become a possibility and one day even a reality. As I’ve heard Dena say often, “do the work, show up every day”. If we believed something to be totally unrealistic why would we even start to do the work.

In 2012 I got to Bhekasana before the accident, in the next two years of pain, surgery, rehab and physio I seriously doubted I would ever return to the heady heights of intermediate, but Louise told me to come and do what I could, what was possible then. The practice definitely helps in the healing process, not just physically but mentally as well, when you are on the point of giving up something happens and you think ok I’ll give it another go.

After another unrelated surgery in June 2015 it took me until the beginning of this year to feel like I was back to the point of being comfortable. But then I felt stuck, I was on a plateau, I could do my practice without having to make the mental or physical effort, I had stopped working towards anything, I didn’t leave AYL with that feeling of satisfaction or even joy, it was like “is this it”. I was seriously wondering what was the point of going to the Shala.

I spoke to L about how I felt my practice was drifting, lacking a focus or challenge. My dropbacks were / are still the problem because of the shoulder. L had me working harder at Salabhasana and Bhekasana, they improved.

So last Sunday I realise L is behind me to assist my last posture Bhekasana as usual, somehow my left hand managed to face forward and semi press down “better” she says and let’s go after raising my chest. I do the vinyasa and sit down not realising L is still there and has said “Dhanurasana “, I look up and she says “take Dhanurasana”.

Dhanurasana has been my “Unrealistic expectation”, and if I’d seen it that way and not carried on getting on the mat it still would be, in 2012-2015 it was unrealistic but now exactly 3 years and 10 months after she said “take Bhekasana” it’s possible.


3 Responses to “What is unrealistic?”

  1. Caroline Says:

    Inspiring read Kevin. I’m feeling quite stuck myself at the moment at Bakasana B. I definitely identify with that feeling of leaving AYL without the previous sense of joy. Hoping things will change, but it feels like a year of going nowhere.

  2. donutszenmom Says:

    I think you’re proving over and over again that “unrealistic” isn’t something you’re bound by. Congrats on dhanurasana. Enjoy it!

  3. susiegb Says:

    Lovely post Kevin. Great insights … Enjoy your time with Dena!

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