Muggle Nurse

IMG_3448.JPGIt’s that time of year when the GP Nurse calls me in for the health check, usual questions;
Alcohol – None
Smoking – Never
Height and weight, BMI of 21.

Height, ok she can’t change that, but weight, yet again I see her peering at the scales, giving them a tap and wondering if she needs to send them off for re calibration. 5ft 7″ and under 9 1/2 stone (61kg) despite wearing jeans for work and a thick sweater.

So she asks with a withering look if I eat a healthy diet, well ok I don’t do fruit and there’s only so much veg, the odd bit of cake and chocolate do feature, but I have 3 meals a day and a hot chocolate before I go to bed.

So her next gambit is to get her syringe out and poke my arm to do a cholesterol test, she seems determined to find something, she is getting better, she hit the vein on the first go for a change, though I’m still bruised 4 days later, but she loses that one too, she says even skinny people can have cholesterol, it needs to be under 5 and I score 4.6 ha ha bring on the chocolate croissants.

So then she starts quizzing me about exercise, so I tell her I do Ashtanga yoga, she replies she does yoga, I ask her what she does, I would describe what she does as “very gentle”, good for her, each to their own, but then she says what I do doesn’t count as exercise! Two hours a day, sweating like a pig sometimes, but on her scoreboard I don’t do any exercise! The only way to get these “professionals” to understand what we do 6 days a week is for them to be made to do it, instead of considering yoga as ommming naval gazing!

I can’t wait for the GP to review it, “he’s skinny, has a crap diet, does no exercise, but has a healthy BMI and a good cholesterol score”.


2 Responses to “Muggle Nurse”

  1. Mike Evans Says:

    Must be some kinda wizardry. She’s right, mind you. Ashtanga yoga isn’t exercise. It’s medicine. Like all medicine it can do harm if applied incorrectly.

    My BMI generally comes out about 23. “Most like someone from Laos” according to a BBC online gizmo from a couple of years back.

    Must do more Omming.

  2. Lucy Scott back in the sticks again – day 1- Technicalities | The Journey of my practice Says:

    […] A journey with no end in sight « Muggle Nurse […]

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